GALERA WITH A DIFFERENT SET OF PEOPLE.

April 2 and 3...Jan and I joined Lod and company to Galera. Old beach. New set of friends. New feelings involved...For the first time, I had someone I'm "romantically involved" with, with me on this island. Yes, the man and his "so-called special friend" goes to Galera. Nagwagi ang kabit sa desisyong sumama siya. Oo, nag-away sila. Oo, naipilit ko ang gusto ko. Masarap ang pakiramdam ng nagwawagi sa ganitong sitwasyon dahil mula sa simula, TALO AKO. It was fun and sweet having him around that weekend...Feeling ko we made the bogus relationship stronger. Echos. Feeling ko lang talaga yan.=) For the first time rin, nag-banana boat ride ako. It was an experience...although may pasa ako after na hindi ko alam kung paano ko nakuha! Sa dinami-dami kong beses na nagpupunta sa beach, ngayon ko lang napicturan ang sunset. For the first time as well, pinahiram ko siya ng pera para pambili ng pasalubong sa #1 nya...Ayos ba. I think, being the emotional person that I am, I will say a lot more about this than any other topic.

There is a HUGE difference between being nice and being stupid. We all know this, and it is something that is repeatedly relayed to me by all of my closest friends. It's nice that I spend time with him. It's nice that I enjoy his company. BUT, it's stupid for me to tolerate him in making me his second girl. It's stupid for me to act as if I don't care. It's stupid for me to learn to love him...

There you go...I blurted it out. Yes. After 5 months, I have already come to accept the truth that along the way, I have come to love this guy to some degree. Too many times I have attempted to "create" an issue for him to get mad and just leave me, or magtampo sa mga maliliit na bagay para lang hindi na kami magpansinan, pero after a day, ok na naman ako. Hindi ko siya matiis pag nagpapakasweet na siya...and I guess, hindi ko lang talaga kayang mawala siya ng tuluyan, period. Eto na naman ako sa mga dead-end relationships...Alam ko ng ngang walang patutunguhan, sige pa rin. Idedefend ko na naman sarili ko by saying that the reason why I'm still engaging in such a relationship is because I'M HAPPY. True. I am happy...for almost 6 months now.

I just hope that when the time comes that I have to let go, I'm prepared for it. Sana may dumating ng iba before he decides to ditch me...before I'll be left all alone again.